Resilient

resilient – (adjective)

(of a substance or object) able to recoil or spring back into shape after bending, stretching, or being compressed.

(of a person) able to withstand or recover quickly from difficult conditions

After ten weeks of spiritual growth, raw testimonies, real emotions, and comforting camaraderie, my Rooted group took turns being genuine and encouraged one another through “Words of Affirmation” to end one of our final gatherings. We went around the circle taking a few moments to speak words of truth to each member and selected a word that would best reflect their personality and growth throughout our journey. It was a challenging exercise, but immensely rewarding.

One of my best friends, who had seen my passage through rough patches and triumphant victories during the year, brought me to tears with the word she chose for me: resilient.

In that moment, I felt that I truly understood the meaning behind the word she spoke.

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I wanted to be independent.

Autonomous.

Self-sufficient.

The series of events that followed the start of my ‘new years intentions’ were leading me far from that goal of self-reliance. Each transition and change came as a constant and uncomfortable reminder of how dependent and vulnerable I actually was. Needless to say, a bumpy ride ensued.

Independence came to me in waves; the ebb and flow of self-sufficiency was temporary. The thought of being free from needing anyone else’s help felt liberating in the start of a new year, but the further I stretched from the people dearest to me the lonelier I felt. I gradually came to realize the importance of community and admitted to myself that walking this life alone wasn’t the way God intended.

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Resiliency can’t happen alone.

While the definition above refers to ‘a person’, something within me knows from experience that overcoming obstacles is rarely done alone. In the midst of seeking independence and feeling defeated by what the world was throwing my way, there was a pivotal moment for me where I finally accepted help.

That was the moment I gave up.

I gave up the need for independence. I gave up my own understanding of how things “should” be. I gave up the fight to keep a mentality that was slowly tearing me down.

I took a step to recover from the difficult conditions I found myself in.

It wrecked me and it was beautiful.

In the end, it was the people around me who made me resilient. People who gave me the courage and encouragement to withstand the trials I faced so I wouldn’t have to bear the weight alone. When I was stretched past my limits and bent out of shape, the sweet reminders of friends, family, and faith were the pieces that kept me together. You made me resilient.

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It’s been a year of recovery. I’ve withstood the storms that have come my way and remained resilient - not of my own independence, but through the wisdom and support of others. Thank you for each word of kindness, act of compassion, and prayer sent on my behalf.

Here’s to another year of learning what it means to be resilient.